Anyone who knows me knows I’m scared of lots of stuff including all sorts of creepy crawlies… and snakes. Especially snakes. Australia has twelve of the top ten most dangerous snakes in the world, and I’m scared of all 172 of them. Even the ones that aren’t dangerous. 

They scare the absolute shit out of me. I don’t care that they’re supposed to be more scared of me than I am of them, because it’s not true. Statistically, mathematically, no snakes is as scared of me as I am of them. My first wife may scream and cry at the sight of me, but no snake ever has. I, on the other hand, may have done both those things upon seeing a snake. Wait, can a snake even cry? Whatever.

If I’d been a better and smarter human, I would have worked on my snake phobia, instead, I bought a pair of snake-proof gaiters and it’s changed my life almost as much as when I discovered Culture Club in the 80s.

(If you don’t know what gaiters are – and I’m not talking alligators – they’re things you wear over your shoes when hiking, and can cover anything from just your ankles all the way up to your knees. Some people use them to stop small stones and grit getting into their shoes, some to protect their lower leg from prickles etc, and people like me wear them to not do a poo in my pants at even the slightest sound that probably isn’t even a snake.)

I’d toyed with the idea of getting gaiters for a few years, but didn’t want to look like even more of a dickhead that I usually do so resisted. Putting off buying gaiters is like putting off getting up to go for a wee in the middle of the night. When you finally do, you wish you’d done it a lot sooner.

So when I planned another trip to Cambodia at the start of 2019, I finally bit the bullet and not only grabbed myself a great new pair of Merrell Moab 2 boots, but some Sea to Summit Quagmire gaiters. 

I was planning on doing some jungle hikes looking for wildlife on a photography trip, and I knew my usual trail running shoes wouldn’t make the cut. I also knew gaiters wouldn’t protect me from all the snakes they have there considering some live in trees and last time I was there one fell and almost landed on me, but the ground snakes would have to get pretty high to bite over these knee-high gaiters so they gave me at least some protection – and more importantly, given the chance of a snake bite is actually relatively low – a lot of peace of mind!

I spent quite a few days in the jungle tracking gibbons and birds, and also some elephants, and had an absolute blast with not a care in the world. Until someone spotted a cobra and I started to wonder if I could buy an entire outfit out of the same stuff my gaiters were made of.

Since getting back to Australia, I’ve continued to put them to good use, using them in all sorts of bush and scrubland that I would usually be afraid to walk through alone in my regular trail shoes. 

Because I’m usually out with the camera gear looking for things to photograph, especially birds up in the trees, my attention on the trail ahead isn’t always what it should be, so the chances of upsetting a sun baking brown or red belly black are a lot higher than they would otherwise be!

I know not everyone will have the same risk factor as I do, or be as much of a scaredy cat, but I honestly cannot even begin to tell you how much more enjoyable my time outdoors has been thanks to this one, simple purchase.

Sputnik

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