There’s an old joke, (and no, it’s not me), which I guess probably isn’t a joke but more of a parable or something, about a guy who keeps praying to god to let him with the lottery so his life will be better. He does this for years and years and one day god finally appears and says to him, wait for it, “for fuck’s sake buy a lottery ticket mate”. And yes, god calls him ‘mate’, because she’s Australian. Obviously.

I always remember that story/joke/parable thing because it’s a really, really important example of how we have to do our bit to make shit happen.

And look, I’m not saying manifestation can’t or doesn’t work. What I am saying is, in my world at least, work works. I know way more people who did the work themselves to get what they want.

Perhaps I simply don’t hang out with enough people who are in to crystals and shit who are living their dream lives because they chanted for it or however the fuck manifestation is supposed to work, but whatever. Maybe they’re genuinely manifesting their electricity bills away while I’m doing it old school and using Bpay. Fuck knows really.

All I know is that I gave a talk recently where afterwards someone said they enjoyed it even if some of it was “a bit corny”. Which was fair enough, but also, fuck that person. And please know, if I ever ask you for feedback, I’d much rather you lie and tell me I was awesome than tell me I was a bit corny. But not really. You can say it. Just expect a punch in the throat in return.

Now, where was I? That’s right, corny. And one of the reasons is because I actually talked about ‘the law of attraction’ and whenever I do that, I make the observation that ‘action’ is actually part of the word ‘attraction’. Now, in hindsight, I can’t believe this isn’t spoken about more. Or perhaps it is. Or perhaps it isn’t because it’s corny. But when I noticed it myself I thought to myself, ‘self, that’s fucking amazing’. Because to attract shit, you have to do shit. You literally have to act. It’s literally a part of the fucking word.

And that’s the kicker about any of this stuff. The chances of manifesting or attracting stuff while you’re sitting on the couch eating those new chilli Cheezels which are pretty fucking excellent by the way, is low I would have thought. Unless you’re trying to manifest heart disease or something.

I know we all want to think we can just magically attract stuff without doing the work, but, ah, no. Just no. You probably can’t. And by ‘probably’, I really just mean you can’t. I was trying to be nice.

And I know how lovely it is to follow someone who is genetically gifted and looks good in workout gear who will tell you, you can, because don’t we fucking all wish it was true? But no. Just no.

If I was being vaguely scientific, I’d tell you that the part of manifestation or whatever that might actually work, is the part where you at least are clear about and focus on what you want. Once you do that, your brain might just notice things and opportunities that will help you get there. Because at least you know where ‘there’ is, and sometimes that’s half the problem. It’s fucking hard to hit a target you can’t see.

So whether you’re setting new year resolutions or goals or just trying to manifest the shit out of stuff so that things are better for you, there’s good news and bad news:

The bad news is, it’s all bullshit and you have to do the work.

The good news is, it’s all bullshit, but if you do the work, you’re in with a chance.

So for fuck’s sake, buy a ticket.

 

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