I won’t be telling you anything new if I spend too much time describing all the shit things about social media. If you’re on it, you almost certainly already know. It’s a cesspit for negativity, toxicity, whinging, racism, hate and outrage. And worse, it’s trained people to be all those things in increasing amounts in the real world. It’s made it so easy to be those things online, to build those negative habits in a way we never could or would have done in the real world, that it’s helped embolden people to be that way more often, and not just when they’re behind the safety of their keyboards. Or you’re behind the relative safety of yours.
But then, social media is like a gun in that respect. You know that old saying “guns don’t kill people, people do”? Yeah it’s a bit like that. I even saw an article recently about how a new law requiring people to slow down when passing emergency service vehicles attending accidents, was causing accidents. “New speed limit causing accidents” was literally the headline. When we all know a speed limit has literally never, ever caused an accident. That’d be the drivers who do that.
Where does that leave us with social media then? In addition to being all those fucked up things I described earlier, social media is also the exact opposite. It’s also beautiful and inspiring and uplifting and educational and positive and awesome. At least it can be.
Social media is not the problem.
It turns out ‘social media’ is not the problem. We are. What we use it for. How we use it.
Which is why over the past few years I’ve experimented with being on and off social media, trying to find a better way to use it. I used to think people who went on and off social media were a bit mental, but the past year or two I’ve been doing the same thing, (maybe I just proved my theory that people who do that are mental?) and it’s been a fascinating exercise. I won’t say it was an experiment exactly, because it’s not really been planned. There have just been times where I’ve thought “fuck it” and taken a break.
Earlier this year, I spent all of January and February off Facebook before feeling like getting back to it. I then lasted most of March before taking April off again. Then I came back with a vengeance in May and did posts and videos and tackled issues I was passionate about. And was doing pretty well until about a month ago when, without any real planning, one night I just thought “fuck it” again and deactivated my account.
Sometimes when I take a break, I simply log out and leave my account sitting there so people can still see it, send messages etc. But I’m an addict, so I do find it a bit difficult not to just open up Facebook to see what’s going on. So this time I deactivated which inevitably led to a few people wondering if they’d been blocked. If you’re one of those people, rest assured, you’re not blocked. Not to say I won’t block you when I go back on, but for now at least, you’re safe.
My confession. A few in fact.
First, the easy one: I’ve still been using Instagram. I find it’s not quite so toxic, and more importantly, I use Instagram differently to how I use Facebook. I mostly follow outdoor and adventure brands and people (like Taylor Swift), so my feed is almost completely filled with beauty and inspiration. Every now and then I see someone being bitchy or negative, but for the most part, it’s pretty fucking rad, so not only does it not ruin my day with shit, it actually makes me feel better. And when I do see something negative, or something that doesn’t inspire me or make me feel good, I just unfollow. And weirdly, that doesn’t seem as difficult to do as ‘unfriending’ someone on Facebook. (I actually think the title of ‘friend’/‘unfriend’ on Facebook makes doing that tougher so we tend to stick with people we don’t actually like all that much, just so we don’t offend them. And actually… fuck. that.)
Now my even bigger confession: Yes, I deactivated my personal Facebook account, but I still have a Facebook Page, my ‘ego page’ as I call it, and I also have access to the work Facebook account. Part of my work involves having access to Facebook so we have a work account. The work account doesn’t really have any friends, but it does follow a bunch of pages. Again, like Instagram, it means the feed I get access to is very different to my personal one. It’s brands. It’s nature. It’s positive. It’s adventure. It’s inspirational. It’s Taylor Swift.
There are a few news sites we follow which deliver my share of negativity, and if I dare read the comments, all the other stuff that makes social media so shitty. For the most part it’s a pretty epic feed though.
Of course, it also means I can post on my own ‘ego page’ as I call it. And for some reason, don’t ask me exactly why, I tend to post different stuff there. It’s mostly about running and adventure and nature… with only a tiny bit of business and current affairs thrown in. Which means it’s almost certainly more ‘rainbows and unicorns’ than ‘fuck you-nicorns’. It also means I’m very rarely commenting on other people’s posts or replying to their comments on tricky subjects, and that definitely makes life much more peaceful. I suppose I could adopt that approach with my regular Facebook, but I don’t. I’ve always been a bit all or nothing in life, and I guess social media is no exception.
Missing out. The good and the bad.
What’s the wrap up of this whole thing then? The truth is, I’ve probably missed out on knowing a few things I would like to have been up on. Maybe stuff about friends, maybe stuff about world affairs, maybe even stuff that would have been useful for business. But it is what it is. And in the meantime, I’ve had a much more peaceful month. And the word still turned. I still ran. Watched a few of the latest shows on Netflix. Kayaked. Hiked. Saw dolphins. Photographed birds. Did business. Caught up with friends. (OK, that’s a lie, I don’t really catch up with friends but I did message one and chat to another on the phone quickly.) And the world still turned. I did weaken a couple of times and comment on some particularly vile racist comments I saw, which achieved absolutely nothing and almost certainly did not change anyone else’s minds about immigration or people from faraway places. And the world still turned.
Maybe having a second account isn’t necessary or won’t work for you. Maybe you don’t need to log out or deactivate. But ‘decluttering’ your newsfeed can definitely change your life. Maybe that means unfriending a few people, or if you’re not quite ready for that, just unfollow them. If there’s a page that regularly posts stuff that gets your blood boiling, unlike, unfollow, or even block it. And for fuck’s sake don’t read the comments. Never, ever read the comments.
For me personally, I guess I’ll wander back online again soon enough for another ‘tour of social media duty’, until then, I didn’t unfriend you. But that doesn’t mean I won’t if you’re a bit of a cunt. 😉
Sputnik
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PIC: This pic was taken on the Fleurieu Peninsula, South Australia.
