A few weeks back, I made a last minute decision to run the Murray Bridge Half Marathon with a massive rainbow flag. It wasn’t something I dreamed up over time and planned meticulously to be some comprehensive campaign. It was originally a one-off thing born of frustration that people in the LGBTIQ community are constantly, relentlessly subjected to unnecessary harassment, discrimination and… I’m not even sure what the word or phrase is, but constantly having the legitimacy of existence questioned.
Imagine going for a job, and wondering if who you love might prevent you from getting it?
Imagine going to a store and being told they won’t serve you because of who you love?
Imagine walking down the street and not feeling safe because of who you love?
It’s fucking crazy.
And this is worse.
Suicide statistics in Australia are off the charts. Eight people a day die by suicide. Eight. A day. Suicide is the biggest killer of men aged 15-54. Young Aussies are literally now more likely to die by suicide than a car accident for fuck’s sake. Sorry for the stats, but we need to acknowledge just how enormous this issue is. And people in the LGBTIQ between the ages of 16-27 are FIVE TIMES MORE LIKELY to be one of those statistics.
FIVE TIMES?!?!?!?
I mean what the actual fuck? How are we still even entertaining conversations about how it should be OK to tell gay people they’re sinners and going to hell because of who they love?
Fuck. That.
As some of you will know, I got fairly invested in the Folau situation, and interacted with many people on social media. Not always in the most ah, positive, constructive way. Mostly, but not always. And I felt frustrated. And helpless. And to be honest, a bit hopeless. And arguing with people who were never going to change their mind was not a good use of my time or energy.
So I thought about what else I could do. And I realised, the vast majority of Aussies are either supportive of the LGBTIQ community, or at worst, apathetic… they just don’t care cause they know it’s irrelevant and none of their business.
Even plenty of churches are supportive.
Which just leaves a really small minority that have a disproportionate amount of volume and visibility. Because tolerance and acceptance are usually largely silent and invisible. Because they require nothing. No effort. No negativity. No hate. No media. People just go about their lives.
Discrimination, on the other hand, gets loud. So loud, sometimes it’s all people see. So we get a distorted view of the world based on volume and visibility. It’s easy to think those with all that volume and visibility represent everyone else when really they don’t.
So I started to wonder, what if ‘everyone else’ was louder and more visible? What if the support was louder than the criticism and bullshit ‘sinner’ narrative? What if people in the LGBTIQ felt loved and accepted more of the time, all of the time, and not just on ‘special occasions when regular people got their #LoveIsLove on?
My idea then, was pretty simple: I didn’t have to stand in front of a tank in Tiananmen Square, I’d just follow that old adage “do what you can, with what you’ve got, where you are right now”. And what I am is a bit of a runner. And what I got was a bloody big rainbow flag. Admittedly, a bit bigger than I realised when I ordered it. 🙄 So I figured I’d go run with it and I would have made my own little micro-statement and showed my support.
It may not have been a stand-off with a tank, but I won’t lie, I was still nervous. Would I get abused? Worse? It’s all always a possibility.
What I didn’t anticipate was what happened next. First, there were some amazing messages. One or two in particular that made me cry that something so small I’d done, had meant something to a few other humans. And then there was some kickback. Which reminded me why I decided it was important to do this in the first place. Both types of feedback motivated me to do it again.
So last week I put it out to my friends and asked where I should run with my flag next. It just so happened the 6/12/24hr run was on the weekend, So I put my flag where my mouth is, and ran laps of the 2.2km Uni Loop for 6hrs straight on Saturday, in the wind and the rain and under a fucking magnificent big gay rainbow in the sky, and knocked out 50kms.
I hadn’t been training for this event, I hadn’t been well during the week, but I did it anyway. (Paying for it a bit now, but whatever. A small price to pay.)
And I heard one story after the race that made me cry again, and made me realise how important it is that people do what they can, with what they’ve got, whenever they can.
Along the way, the paper got interested and ran a big pic and a little story which means tolerance and love and acceptance got a bit more volume and visibility. It didn’t magically make everything better, but not much in the world changes magically overnight. Maybe just one teeny tiny huffy puffy sweaty flag waving step at a time.
The City to Bay is now on my list of races to ‘Rainbow Run’ but it’s also the one I’m most nervous about because 25,000 people means the chances of copping some flack are exponentially higher. Not that it will stop me, but I’ll definitely be more nervous because of it. As someone explained to me when they messaged me after my first Rainbow Run, “We are unseen a lot of the time, and terrified when we are seen” and that totally broke my fucking heart.
So I’ll be seen. And heard.
Because discrimination can be loud, but nothing should be louder than love.
Be awesome to each other.
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